Next time you’re in a conflict during conversation, give “looping” a try. To sum up the practice, as described by mediator Amanda Ripley:
Listen for what seems most important to the other person (not to you!).
When that person is done sharing, reflect back to them what you heard, distilling their point(s) into “the most elegant language you can muster."
Then ask them, “Is that right? Did I get what you were trying to say?”
(My thanks to Amanda Ripley, via The OnBeing Project.)
The Gentle Nudge
Join other Rafters this week for . . .
WEDNESDAY: Creatives’ Coffee (Zoom, 4:00-5:00PM Central, at this link)
THURSDAY: Poetry Pick-Me-Up (Zoom, 12:00-1:00PM Central, at this link)
I often say “I hear you” to let them know I am truly listening.
Such a good reminder.
People first need to feel heard and seen.
Was talking to friends last night about favorite teachers we'd had. The common demotivator was they made us feel seen.